
and so...... what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you what are you and so...... after six dry martinis in black suits and so...... as you awaken from a nightmare and so...... in between sex and sleep and so...... six martinis in black suits soothsayer without roots a child torn out of his romping boots with expensive shoes isolating insulating keeping your feet away from the earth and so...... what are you organic synergy? you? synapse equlas TAB A receptor equals SLOT B insert TAB A into SLOT B and so...... there you are...... more than you but then what are you let us dwell in this and dig and delve for just one truth what are you because, you know, religion science philosophy let alone politicians keep asking keep knocking on your shell begging you to come out and play because the lights are on but nobody ever seems to be home and we have to ask where could you be if not here or are we here...... and are you empty...... and so...... what are you you know they say you aren't much different than an anthill anthill anthill anthill you aren't much different each cell driven to be...... to do what it should wearing the right shoes not much different than an anthill forever doing doing doing propelling the body and then compelling the body and then telling the body it is more...... than a body but not much different than an anthill so do anthills think so do cities think so does the universe think and so...... do you think and so...... what are you after those six dry martinis synapse receptor synapse receptor synapse receptor synapse misssssssss and you...... have freeeee wiiiilllllll to do...... to be...... to go...... to did was went missssssss and are you you? that may be the point but what were you before what are you add it up this cell plus this cell plus this cell plus this cell ad infinitum (because once you get through adding you have to subtract and add one more) equals desires dreams delusions and so...... it comes back to six dry martinis and free will and anthill and synapse response and anyway what are you...... and so...... does an anthill dream no no no no no no you think anthills don't have language synapse receptor anthilss don't have art synapse receptor anthills don't have love synapse receptor anthills do not argue synapse receptor close your eyes break mirrors it is just synapse receptor synapse receptor synapse receptor now and so...... what are you not much different from an anthill not much different from a city not much different from a universe but not and so what are you and you know you're sitting there receiving signals perfume curve flower words and you know parts of you are very busy sorting classifying arranging signals but you...... you aren't paying attention not all of you only your parts can an anthill focus its attention can an anthill maintain the constant upkeep of young and household and feeding and rebuilding and reconosaince and queen and still concentrate on your picnic and so...... not much different than an anthill nononononononononononono no no no no no no no you think but then what are you in this time and place but a box the present incarnation of helical structures a begotten box begetting boxes in between sex and sleep there you find contentment love, companionship, comfort so there you are and so...... a sum of happy receptors happy happy happy because they know you're much more more boxes and the worker ants are happy happy happy when the queen lays her eggs happy little receptors begetting receptors happy little boxes begetting boxes for twisted treasures but...... indeed...... not much different than an anthill, city, universe and there you are...... and so...... oh well...... i know i can think of something something that makes me I but who are I dozing next to a warm body there you are...... this must be the dig and delved for truth do anthills doze into pleasant dreaming do anthills hold hands do anthill yearn for other anthills does the universe yearn for another universe what are you you are what yearning desires love are you not or not...... receptors are only doing their jobs or is love more than the sum of biology or not...... more than the sum of boxes and begetting or not...... more than the sum of what are you and so...... being sum and more where does love live where are you if you are a what here............there............ yearning for another universe quarks muons atoms quasars galaxies black holes where do they look for love and do they hold hands by candlelight indeed...... and do they [you] exist less sum to what if they never hold hands do anthills awaken in shivering uncertitude indeed do you...... are you less if you do not any less of a box and just what are those happy little receptors doing in dreams just what who and where are you in dreams or as you love in dreams which boils down to what are you or are you two come reductionist chase me now i have you in the corner indeed happy little receptors indeed missssss indeed what are you unimaginable imagination scaring themselves silly or do receptors like horror movies do anthills like to get scared do anthills have an evil first grade teacher from hell plaguing their subconcious do anthills have a subconcious being the question do anthills have a concious to bear a sub being the question and you do you synapse martini synapse martini mynapse sartini misssss indeed so if sub is opposed to concious where do both live with love do anthills like horror movies and where is horror when the little receptors are too busy for movies with love and so...... is or are you and/or time compatible with horror and so...... who is time are you and so...... do ants like horror movies how about receptors how about romantic comedy not much different than an anthill much being mostly unquatifiable and of vague outline much different...... than...... and anthill what are you and what is who and so...... we i you them who are what and so...... what are you miiiiiissssssssssss
©Elizabeth Anker 2021